I'm a Maaaaaniac, Maaaaaaaniac

On the floor and I'm dancing like I've never danced before. That is a pop-culture reference so here are the obligatory lyrics, video and YTMND links. Wait...YTMND!? Great googley moogley, this toaster is really starting to fall apart. Remember this date (3/30/07) because it marks the first and hopefully last time that I ever link to YTMND. As you can see, it was worth it. Tense errors aside, the title sums up last Saturday night pretty well. You see, I was in a wedding and I've never met a dance floor at a wedding I didn't like.

I said "never" and I'm afraid I'm building this relationship on a foundation of lies. I haven't always been the wedding addict that I am today. Right around the time I was getting out of college and all of my friends were taking the logical (what?) next step of marriage; I hated weddings. I hated buying gifts, getting dressed up, sitting through the ceremony, receptions, "and guests" and RSVP x 1's....all of it. Who knows why I despised them so much...I'm sure we'll couch that question one day and get to the bottom of it...But, like all lulls, the important question isn't "why the lull." The important question is whether or not I'm still in the valley of despair and the answer to that question is a footloose and fancy free NO. (Spoiler Alert: Yucky love stuff ahead) A more talented writer than myself would insert a poignant metaphor. I'll attempt nothing of the sort. Let's just say that I realized that, if I ever plan on finding love, I should probably start paying attention to what it actually looks like. Honestly, other than the events of last night (a story that is not mine to tell), there is hardly a better place to locate love (free food, free alcohol, dancing or single women) than a wedding. You can quote me on that.

It's spring and, while I'm falling in love with my allergy medicine, everyone else is falling in love with someone. So, you probably don't need to read any further. IF you are reading further and you have an abnormally small number (< 1)Y chromosomes, I have got an offer for YOU.

Mayor's Masters Receptions: I can already see that this is going to be the Masters Edition of my to-do list. It's hardly avoidable. If you are in town, you should totally check this out. Free food and drink down at the soon-to-be defunct Golf Hall of Fame. The weather is the only thing that could bogey this event (that was a really bad golf reference...you're welcome). Monday, 5pm-dark

Drive for Show. Rock fore Dough: No mulligans on this one. A concert like this, literally, only comes to Augusta once a year so you better take advantage of it while it's here. Dashboard Confessional, Cheap Trick, and Corey Smith for $25, part of which goes to the First Tee. Sounds like a good time and a clear conscience to me. Next Tuesday. Show starts at 5:30pm.

Last Call: I have a really hard time telling anyone they should go to Last Call so you can assume this will be worth it. They have 3; count 'em, three concerts next week that demand your attention. It's a hole-in-one, really. The annual Par 3 after party is featuring the Swingin' Medallions. Thursday night Drivin' and Cryin' will perform. Finally, Friday night will again feature the Swingin' Medallions. Also, All concerts are in the parking lot outside of Last Call and that's a good thing. Concerts start...that's about all the info I could find. Best guess is 7pm. Tix are $11-$16.

The Masters: By typing their name over there, I'm risking being sued so if you go, don't tell them I sent you. The tournament has become the tournament to attend lately. I think Martha Burke actually hurt her cause with her crusade because Masters Badges are becoming the hardest ticket to get in all of sports. Years ago I would have told you to hang out outside of the main gate and just ask someone for a ticket but that method is now defunct. Expect to really pay if you don't already have tickets.

Hope everyone has a great weekend and even better Masters Week. Also, keep an eye out for visual evidence of my wedding escapades. I'm hoping to track down some pictures for all you ladies out there.

-Jake