I don't mean that in the immediate sense (i.e. do you want to get naked right now) and I don't mean it in a figurative sense (i.e. do you want to bare your soul) and I don't think she did either. Honestly, I don't know exactly what she meant (though I can imagine) because, whatever answer she was looking for, she departed before I could complete my well-thought quip: "Like, right now? Here? Wait, what?" I can only assume the expected payout on the southern-dopey-white-guy slot machine was not, that night, high enough to warrant another spin.
Las Vegas is a strange town.
If you've never been to Vegas, I highly recommend you grab a few friends and head out west....it's like Disney World--complete with rides, games, shows, lots of walking and long lines--for adults. The similarities don't end there. Like Disney World, Las Vegas is also a fantasy world, largely imaginary, and an exercise in suspending reality.
One of the things about Vegas that really caught me off-guard was how beautiful everything--everything--was. Physical beauty and sophistication ooze from all of the people, places and things that are Vegas, baby. Average--average looks, average income, average experience--is a term that is so far to the right of the standard deviation of the rest of the country that the word has lost its meaning. Vegas creates a world so fantastic that the useful and necessary resources in Vegas have almost no value in the real world...and I ate it up. Within hours of setting foot on the strip I was immersed, indoctrinated, intoxicated. I judged every book by its cover and valued every option by its potential to satisfy me....I was back in middle school and acutely aware of my own short-comings.
Fortunately, I'm back. Back where I am again the coolest, prettiest person I know. I'm glad to be back (I had begun to miss my mirror) but I do miss all the options. On the strip your senses are assaulted every six feet, figuratively, by this show or that club. We don't have that problem in Augusta...normally.
Ed Turner & Number 9 - Deja Vu is both a club in Vegas and what you might be experiencing. I mentioned this little opportunity last week and it's such a winner that it gets another hat tip this week. I couldn't name 2 Beatles songs if I had to but I know a good time when I see it. I've seen these guys once before and I'll be seeing them again tomorrow night. Join me at Fort Discovery at 7pm.
The Beauty Queen of Leename - I'd be lying if I told you I've seen this show. I've seen this show, it's amazing (I've always had problems building trust) and you'll love it. It's about something that happened to this person, sometime ago. Le Chat Noir is hosting performances this weekend, next and the following. Say what you will of my review, but believe me that Le Chat Noir never disappoints. Intimate off-Broadway style theater--$25 and worth it.
80's Night - As iconic and disastrous as the 80's were, I'm surprised Vegas has not created an 80's themed casino. My guess is that it's coming (if the city doesn't go bankrupt first) but until then, Soul Bar is the one-stop venue for all your 80's party needs. They usually have a cover charge and the party won't get rockin' until 11. Take your dancing shoes and a shower before bed.
The Aiken Trials - It's horse racing season in Aiken and you know what that means...it's horse betting/mint julep season in Aiken. The Aiken Trials is the first event of Aiken's Triple Crown and the festivities start this weekend at 10am. The weather doesn't look like it's going to cooperate so you ladies may want to make sure your hat is weatherproof and big. Fellas, keep drinking and you'll forget all about the rain and the money you owe the book. General Admission tickets are $10.
I hope I haven't turned you off to Las Vegas. There really is no other place like it and everyone should see it light up the desert at least once, but spending time there really makes you long for relationships that are reciprocal and unconditional. If you've got that, you've got reason enough to party. See you out.
-Jake
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